Going back to when Tara first showed an interest in horses and started riding, everything was horses, she just loved horses. Before I separated we had a piece of land and someone offered us a horse, well we got offered a couple but the first one came from friends of ours who had a small pony sitting in a paddock which no one did anything with, and when we stayed with them TT would spend most of her time with this horse, Pocket. They suggested we take him home, so I put it to the EX, “no” was the response. I reassured TT I’d keep working on it and eventually “no” became “if you want but I’m not looking after it, I want nothing to do with it”.
Little Pocket wasn’t broken, he was just a pet and eventually a similar thing happened with Beau a horse she could ride. But Beau was old and hard to look after and TT also needed something more challenging. A friend of ours wanted to sell their horse, so Beau was given away and we bought Lily. TT fell in love the moment she saw Lily and a special bond was born. Lily was smart, challenging and could be very difficult. Someone suggested we get a friend to work her but I said no, this was TT’s job, she had to figure it out. Which she did! Lily has been an amazing pony and TT has grown so much and become such good rider.
When I separated it was made clear again that the horses were my problem and the EX wanted nothing to do with them. Which was cool, they were my choice and I’ll deal with it. Little did I know that I’d be out of work for nearly 3 months about a year later. Paying a mortgage, feeding horses and keeping up with the bills got harder and harder. The debts grew. It wasn’t long after I’d met PB and I didn’t want her to know the situation I was in. It was often suggested I sell the horses, “just sell the fucking things!” I was told.
When you have a young girl who simply lives for her horse, who when she isn’t riding, is drawing a picture of her horse or googling something on horses. Taking that away from her would just crush her little soul.
She came up to me one day with $10 in her hand and said “here dad I know you don’t have much money this is my pocket money, it’ll help pay for the horses”. She’s never missed a beat, when Pocket wasn’t well with colic she hobbled around with him in the paddock for 2 hours with a twisted ankle, when there was Poo to pick up she was out there in 35 degree heat in the sun shovelling away without complaints.
So yes we have horses, we also have a young girl with a passion, not just for horses but for life. A girl who is strong, brave and not afraid to try something new. A lot of which I think has come from feeding her passion for horses and encouraging her to go with it, follow her passion and be all that she can be. So often you see parents with kids who have so much potential and passion getting pushed back because it costs to much or they don’t have time. I don’t have time and I don’t have money but to see the smile on her face every time she greets her pony is something that will stay with me for ever
As a parent isn’t your job to raise them to be the best they can be?